Transcript:

Tom: Good evening, I'm Tom Tucker.
Diane: And I'm Diane Simmons. Welcome to Quahog 5 News.
Tom: In today's top story, Pewterschmidtland has just unveiled its latest attraction, and it's already causing quite a stir.
Diane: That's right, Tom. The new attraction is called Whack-A-Safety-Inspector, and it's definitely not for the faint of heart.
Tom: We have Seamus on the line who is live at Pewterschmidtland. Seamus, what can you tell us about this controversial new attraction?
Seamus: Ah, Tom and Diane, it's a pleasure to be here. Let me tell you, this Whack-A-Safety-Inspector is absolutely insane! It's like a carnival game on steroids!
Diane: Seamus, can you explain how the game works?
Seamus: Certainly, Diane. The objective is to whack as many safety inspectors as possible with a giant hammer. They pop up randomly, and you gotta show 'em who's boss!
Tom: That sounds...uh...interesting. But is it safe?
Seamus: Safe? Ha! That's a good one, Tom. This attraction is as safe as a rattlesnake with a chainsaw. But that's what makes it so exciting!
Diane: We have some footage of the attraction in action. Let's take a look.
Tom: Oh boy, this is gonna be good!
Seamus: Alright, here we go! Prepare to be amazed!
Tom: Wow, look at those people swinging those hammers like there's no tomorrow!
Diane: And the safety inspectors, well, they're getting whacked left and right!